zurza » Entertainment

Harry Potter Wants To Bang Ryan Gosling Now

zurza — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 19:03:56 +0000

Apparently Daniel Radcliffe really wants to make sure he’s no longer remembered as the sweet boy-wizard beloved the world over, but instead as a pubic-hair loving alcoholic who thinks his movies are better than Scorsese now because have you heard? Daniel Radcliffe drinks and likes pubes. Recognize. On that note, here he is fantasizing about Read More ...

Snooki Looks Good Without Makeup On? That Can’t Be Right.

zurza — Thu, 19 Jan 2012 15:29:51 +0000

Apparently it’s celebrities going au naturel on Twitter week, because here’s Snooki without makeup on in a photo posted to Twitter yesterday and, no, your coffee wasn’t switched with a beaker of LSD again, she seriously does look decent without an entire cosmetics department shellacked across her face. On a related note, a flaming severed Read More ...

The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 1.17.12

zurza — Tue, 17 Jan 2012 20:45:17 +0000

“Wait. I’m still alive?” Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed where we find out that in the face of impossible odds, James Franco discovered a more irritatingly hipster way to perpetuate a junkie’s motto, Robin Roberts is about a second away from a judo chop to the jugular and Gisele Bundchen reminds us how Read More ...

Sinead O’Connor’s Husband Couldn’t Bear Another Moment With Her Brown Undifficulted: A Love Story

zurza — Wed, 04 Jan 2012 14:51:50 +0000

When Sinead O’Connor‘s marriage to Barry Herridge come to a sudden end just before Christmas, my world became a dark, empty cage of sadness and depression. Was there nothing true in this world? Was anal not the key to the soul? But, alas, a beacon of light has come shining through, proving that love conquers Read More ...

Courtney Stodden In A Bikini Humping Santa

zurza — Tue, 20 Dec 2011 14:48:18 +0000

“Dear Santa of desire: Instead of you silently sliding down my chiseled chimney this year… can I slide down yours? XOs” – Courtney Stodden, poet laureate. Here’s Courtney Stodden in a holiday bikini basically dry-humping Doug Hutchinson in a Santa costume because if there’s one thing that truly captures the magic of Christmas, it’s a Read More ...

Jennifer Love Hewitt Learned How To Be A Bitch

zurza — Thu, 15 Dec 2011 15:08:25 +0000

Wait, Woody, no! The rings! Right around Thanksgiving, Jennifer Love Hewitt found herself dumped by Jarod Einsohn most likely after hearing him saying something along the lines of, “Please stop trying to hide an engagement ring in the stuffing, you goddamn insane cling-monster.” Except that was before she read “Why Men Love Bitches” which clearly Read More ...

Cameron Diaz & Diddy Are Banging

zurza — Wed, 14 Dec 2011 19:09:47 +0000

Fresh off her break up with A-Rod who probably gave her a gift basket filled with HGH and testicle balm, Cameron Diaz is reportedly hooking up with Diddy, according to Page Six: They were caught kissing Saturday night at PH-D at the Dream Downtown Hotel. Spies said the blond actress, who split with Yankee slugger Read More ...

Angelina Jolie is Starving Herself To Save The Children. Beats Me.

zurza — Fri, 09 Dec 2011 18:21:29 +0000

A few weeks ago, there was a report from an alleged former assistant of Angelina Jolie‘s claiming she locks herself in the basement for hours on end performing grueling physical exercises to stay thin. Except it turns out she’s actually been starving herself to save all the poor, hungry children of the world, so I Read More ...

Patrice O’Neal Died (1969 – 2011)

zurza — Tue, 29 Nov 2011 18:07:33 +0000

After suffering a stroke in October, there was little news about the condition of comedian Patrice O’Neal, and now we know the reason. His friends at The Opie & Anthony Radio Show announced Patrice died last night: Yes it’s true that our pal Patrice O’Neal has passed away. The funniest and best thinker i’ve ever Read More ...

The Most Important People on The Internet: Volume 52

zurza — Sat, 19 Nov 2011 15:34:27 +0000

Welcome to the 52nd installment of The Most Important People on The Internet featuring probably the most random assortment of random you guys have ever shat out. While “society” might tell you that the a massive knowledge of pop culture trivia won’t get you job or laid or the love and respect of your parents, Read More ...